Thinking of staying up late?

It's great to stay up late. I stayed up until 5:30 a.m. last weekend, and contrary to what you may believe, I'm feeling great. There are many benefits to staying up late, such as, well...uh...exclusion from chores on the basis of being too tired to even utter a protest?

I've listed some tips below on how to best spend your time while awake during late hours of the night, and other tips on how to keep yourself awake. These are not listed in order of importance.

1. Coffee. Drink it like water (assuming you drink water a lot).

2. Books. Read anything on hand. The Bible, a newspaper, an ABC children's dictionary, etc. I would also recommend Les Miserables.

3. Watch TV. Yeah, so 99.9% of it is stupid and a slap to your intelligence (or lack thereof, if you are a regular TV viewer), but it's one of the best ways to waste time.

4. Walk your dog. If you don't own one, stroll down the street dancing and humming tunes from old musicals.

5. Play video games. If you can secure a copy of Jedi Power Battles, play it during late night hours. I've wasted so much time on that game, especially during late night hours (I still don't know why, it's not that great of a game). If you beat all ten game levels, try to beat the last 4 hidden levels. If you beat them, let me know.

6. Go online and post in your favorite forum. I'm sure quite a few people do this, as the unintelligible drivel that is found in some forums can only be the work of a tired individual who can hardly pry his or her eye open, let alone express themselves clearly.

7. I'm tired.

8. There's more tips. More. But I can't remember them.

9. Hibble. Hibble Wibble.

10. YAWN.

11. HAHAHAHAHA.

12. Food...

13. Girls hate me.

14. Blanket.

15. Pillow.