I'm screwed.
I can't cook. I can't drive. I can't sing. I can't draw. I'm behind in school. I always wake up late. I'm plain looking. I'm skinny. Really skinny. I'm loud mouthed, opinionated, insulting, and irritating.
I'm going straight to hell. I will not pass Go, I will not collect $200.
I'm hearing my sisters tell lame jokes and talk about guys.
Tonight, I'm watching a movie with Orlando Bloom in it.
I accidently broke our digital camera. This means no new pictures for anyone.
Comment and send me some encouragement. I'll have fun deleting your comment. If you're still feeling sorry for me, drop me a line. I'll try my damnedest to ignore it.
31 March 2006
26 March 2006
Thinking of staying up late? 7:59 PM
It's great to stay up late. I stayed up until 5:30 a.m. last weekend, and contrary to what you may believe, I'm feeling great. There are many benefits to staying up late, such as, well...uh...exclusion from chores on the basis of being too tired to even utter a protest?
I've listed some tips below on how to best spend your time while awake during late hours of the night, and other tips on how to keep yourself awake. These are not listed in order of importance.
1. Coffee. Drink it like water (assuming you drink water a lot).
2. Books. Read anything on hand. The Bible, a newspaper, an ABC children's dictionary, etc. I would also recommend Les Miserables.
3. Watch TV. Yeah, so 99.9% of it is stupid and a slap to your intelligence (or lack thereof, if you are a regular TV viewer), but it's one of the best ways to waste time.
4. Walk your dog. If you don't own one, stroll down the street dancing and humming tunes from old musicals.
5. Play video games. If you can secure a copy of Jedi Power Battles, play it during late night hours. I've wasted so much time on that game, especially during late night hours (I still don't know why, it's not that great of a game). If you beat all ten game levels, try to beat the last 4 hidden levels. If you beat them, let me know.
6. Go online and post in your favorite forum. I'm sure quite a few people do this, as the unintelligible drivel that is found in some forums can only be the work of a tired individual who can hardly pry his or her eye open, let alone express themselves clearly.
7. I'm tired.
8. There's more tips. More. But I can't remember them.
9. Hibble. Hibble Wibble.
10. YAWN.
11. HAHAHAHAHA.
12. Food...
13. Girls hate me.
14. Blanket.
15. Pillow.
I've listed some tips below on how to best spend your time while awake during late hours of the night, and other tips on how to keep yourself awake. These are not listed in order of importance.
1. Coffee. Drink it like water (assuming you drink water a lot).
2. Books. Read anything on hand. The Bible, a newspaper, an ABC children's dictionary, etc. I would also recommend Les Miserables.
3. Watch TV. Yeah, so 99.9% of it is stupid and a slap to your intelligence (or lack thereof, if you are a regular TV viewer), but it's one of the best ways to waste time.
4. Walk your dog. If you don't own one, stroll down the street dancing and humming tunes from old musicals.
5. Play video games. If you can secure a copy of Jedi Power Battles, play it during late night hours. I've wasted so much time on that game, especially during late night hours (I still don't know why, it's not that great of a game). If you beat all ten game levels, try to beat the last 4 hidden levels. If you beat them, let me know.
6. Go online and post in your favorite forum. I'm sure quite a few people do this, as the unintelligible drivel that is found in some forums can only be the work of a tired individual who can hardly pry his or her eye open, let alone express themselves clearly.
7. I'm tired.
8. There's more tips. More. But I can't remember them.
9. Hibble. Hibble Wibble.
10. YAWN.
11. HAHAHAHAHA.
12. Food...
13. Girls hate me.
14. Blanket.
15. Pillow.
Thinking of staying up late? 7:59 PM
It's great to stay up late. I stayed up until 5:30 a.m. last weekend, and contrary to what you may believe, I'm feeling great. There are many benefits to staying up late, such as, well...uh...exclusion from chores on the basis of being too tired to even utter a protest?
I've listed some tips below on how to best spend your time while awake during late hours of the night, and other tips on how to keep yourself awake. These are not listed in order of importance.
1. Coffee. Drink it like water (assuming you drink water a lot).
2. Books. Read anything on hand. The Bible, a newspaper, an ABC children's dictionary, etc. I would also recommend Les Miserables.
3. Watch TV. Yeah, so 99.9% of it is stupid and a slap to your intelligence (or lack thereof, if you are a regular TV viewer), but it's one of the best ways to waste time.
4. Walk your dog. If you don't own one, stroll down the street dancing and humming tunes from old musicals.
5. Play video games. If you can secure a copy of Jedi Power Battles, play it during late night hours. I've wasted so much time on that game, especially during late night hours (I still don't know why, it's not that great of a game). If you beat all ten game levels, try to beat the last 4 hidden levels. If you beat them, let me know.
6. Go online and post in your favorite forum. I'm sure quite a few people do this, as the unintelligible drivel that is found in some forums can only be the work of a tired individual who can hardly pry his or her eye open, let alone express themselves clearly.
7. I'm tired.
8. There's more tips. More. But I can't remember them.
9. Hibble. Hibble Wibble.
10. YAWN.
11. HAHAHAHAHA.
12. Food...
13. Girls hate me.
14. Blanket.
15. Pillow.
I've listed some tips below on how to best spend your time while awake during late hours of the night, and other tips on how to keep yourself awake. These are not listed in order of importance.
1. Coffee. Drink it like water (assuming you drink water a lot).
2. Books. Read anything on hand. The Bible, a newspaper, an ABC children's dictionary, etc. I would also recommend Les Miserables.
3. Watch TV. Yeah, so 99.9% of it is stupid and a slap to your intelligence (or lack thereof, if you are a regular TV viewer), but it's one of the best ways to waste time.
4. Walk your dog. If you don't own one, stroll down the street dancing and humming tunes from old musicals.
5. Play video games. If you can secure a copy of Jedi Power Battles, play it during late night hours. I've wasted so much time on that game, especially during late night hours (I still don't know why, it's not that great of a game). If you beat all ten game levels, try to beat the last 4 hidden levels. If you beat them, let me know.
6. Go online and post in your favorite forum. I'm sure quite a few people do this, as the unintelligible drivel that is found in some forums can only be the work of a tired individual who can hardly pry his or her eye open, let alone express themselves clearly.
7. I'm tired.
8. There's more tips. More. But I can't remember them.
9. Hibble. Hibble Wibble.
10. YAWN.
11. HAHAHAHAHA.
12. Food...
13. Girls hate me.
14. Blanket.
15. Pillow.
16 March 2006
Let's blow up the Blogosphere! 8:30 PM
I've decided that we should all agree that excess blogs authored by illiterate and boring morons should be discontinued, deleted, and made to disappear completely. That way, their audience will come to me.
I still remember the days when having a blog was a novel idea. Now EVERYONE has one. One day it will be the custom to no longer just exchange e-mail addresses with new friends, but blog URLs as well.
A friend once sent me this article, saying, "Eman no offense to ur blog thing but read this". I've stopped having a "blog thing" some time ago. I used to post uninteresting happenings, and you may find one or two such posts in the future, but "blogging" about every little thing I do during the course of my day isn't rewarding to me at all. This website just keeps evolving.
I hate having to post "for the people". I write what I feel like writing at the time, whatever I damn well please, in the style I'm comfortable with. To try to create content that is popular with the majority of the world these days (adding pictures, being real funny, being "deep" and insightful, blah blah blah...) is a headache, trends are volatile.
One thing that irks me the most is people who "blog" as if they were sending an IM to someone. "yeah, so i tld my freind 'talk tothe hand', lol :D" Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. I know I've written about this before, but these people really IRK me.
I still remember the days when having a blog was a novel idea. Now EVERYONE has one. One day it will be the custom to no longer just exchange e-mail addresses with new friends, but blog URLs as well.
A friend once sent me this article, saying, "Eman no offense to ur blog thing but read this". I've stopped having a "blog thing" some time ago. I used to post uninteresting happenings, and you may find one or two such posts in the future, but "blogging" about every little thing I do during the course of my day isn't rewarding to me at all. This website just keeps evolving.
I hate having to post "for the people". I write what I feel like writing at the time, whatever I damn well please, in the style I'm comfortable with. To try to create content that is popular with the majority of the world these days (adding pictures, being real funny, being "deep" and insightful, blah blah blah...) is a headache, trends are volatile.
One thing that irks me the most is people who "blog" as if they were sending an IM to someone. "yeah, so i tld my freind 'talk tothe hand', lol :D" Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. I know I've written about this before, but these people really IRK me.
09 March 2006
Gabey Baby 8:19 PM
February 23, 11:32 a.m., Joseph Gabriel Belanger is born.
But please, call him Gabriel.
Weighing 8 pounds and measuring 20 inches at birth, this little guy must be the cutest thing since Milo and Otis.
I shouldn't start bragging about him. Everyone else thinks their baby is the cutest, why should I join the ranks of the biased?
But he's pretty cute, eh?
He'd make a dope pope.
I wish I had a picture of his smile, or his face after he sneezes. But he's just too fast and unpredictable.
He's pretty quiet, and he hasn't waken me at night, except that when I carry him he usually cries for his Mommy. But he hasn't puked on any of my shirts yet, I think that means we're getting along.
But please, call him Gabriel.
Weighing 8 pounds and measuring 20 inches at birth, this little guy must be the cutest thing since Milo and Otis.
I shouldn't start bragging about him. Everyone else thinks their baby is the cutest, why should I join the ranks of the biased?
But he's pretty cute, eh?
He'd make a dope pope.I wish I had a picture of his smile, or his face after he sneezes. But he's just too fast and unpredictable.
He's pretty quiet, and he hasn't waken me at night, except that when I carry him he usually cries for his Mommy. But he hasn't puked on any of my shirts yet, I think that means we're getting along.
21 February 2006
Am I Late? 4:52 PM
Yes, Valentine's Day was five days before I wrote the post below.
I actually had a great Valentine's Day, since Jesus is the Lover of my soul. And seeing as I forgot to spread the love to my friends, Family, and readers, let me say that I love you guys and I hope you'll agree with me that peanut butter blows.
I never got around to writing about the last fellowship I went to. And I won't write about it, because I forgot about it, it's not that interesting, and because Nats already took the time to describe the irrelevant details.
I'll just let you all know that I am the Bowling King, and the devil won't get me next time.
The 23rd of this month, my mom will be giving birth to a baby boy, and rowdy boys will rule this family. Please keep her and my soon-to-be brother in your prayers.
I swear, it's a baby invasion. It seems all my friends and everyone I know is getting pregnant. No, that's not the biblical "know".
I think I offended the Japanese. I used to get so many hits from Japan, but ever since I ceased to appear on The Crooked's link list, hits from Japan are about as rare as an honest politician.
I actually had a great Valentine's Day, since Jesus is the Lover of my soul. And seeing as I forgot to spread the love to my friends, Family, and readers, let me say that I love you guys and I hope you'll agree with me that peanut butter blows.
I never got around to writing about the last fellowship I went to. And I won't write about it, because I forgot about it, it's not that interesting, and because Nats already took the time to describe the irrelevant details.
I'll just let you all know that I am the Bowling King, and the devil won't get me next time.
The 23rd of this month, my mom will be giving birth to a baby boy, and rowdy boys will rule this family. Please keep her and my soon-to-be brother in your prayers.
I swear, it's a baby invasion. It seems all my friends and everyone I know is getting pregnant. No, that's not the biblical "know".
I think I offended the Japanese. I used to get so many hits from Japan, but ever since I ceased to appear on The Crooked's link list, hits from Japan are about as rare as an honest politician.
19 February 2006
Chocolate Blows 5:46 PM
Valentine's Day.
Humbug.
It's unnecessary, since I celebrate love 365 days a year, and 366 every leap year.
Valentine's Day is an excuse for my family to rent sappy movies about "love". This time it was Elizabethtown, and it starred Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst. I never thought I'd find the sight of a woman clad in panties and a tight tee to be a turn off, but Kirsten Dunst proved me wrong. I pity the woman, Dunst is a horrible last name. But so is Bloom.
Elizabethtown started off real nice. Orlando Bloom was going to kill himself, my popcorn bowl was almost empty, and no one was sobbing. But then Orlando Bloom's character gets a phone call from his sister, and the movie goes from crappy to sappy.
I have a great idea. The movie should be remade so that Orlando Bloom boards the plane and meets Kirsten Dunst, but then a terrorist hijacks the plane and crashes it into Elizabethtown. I'll call it "The Tragic Five Minute Film of Two Actors with Pathetic Last Names who Can't Act if it Were To Save Their Lives".
It's not that I hate love stories. It's just that there are way-too-many of them. There are billions of people in the world today, most of whom have their personal love story. And that's not counting the billions of people who have lived. Plus all the sappy love movies Hollywood torments me with.
Speaking of love stories, yesterday I watched The Notebook. My family told me it was a great movie, so giving them the benefit of the doubt, I sat down. That night, I refused to sleep in my warm bed, wear my comfy pajamas, and cuddle my teddy bear. Instead, I chose to sleep on the living room couch in my t-shirt and boxers, just to be sure I wasn't losing any of my manly qualities after being exposed to sweet mush like that. As a precautionary measure, I also scratched my butt at random intervals and trained myself to drool on my soft pillow while I slept. Wait, did I say pillow? I meant armrest.
I don't like chocolate. As a child, I used to hurl if I ever ate more than a tiny bit. I don't eat my birthday cakes if the main flavor is chocolate. I only eat chocolate when I'm depressed. Which is never.
Romantics worldwide hope I choke and die at night because I refused to bow down and worship their sacred day and romantic classics.
Humbug.
It's unnecessary, since I celebrate love 365 days a year, and 366 every leap year.
Valentine's Day is an excuse for my family to rent sappy movies about "love". This time it was Elizabethtown, and it starred Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst. I never thought I'd find the sight of a woman clad in panties and a tight tee to be a turn off, but Kirsten Dunst proved me wrong. I pity the woman, Dunst is a horrible last name. But so is Bloom.
Elizabethtown started off real nice. Orlando Bloom was going to kill himself, my popcorn bowl was almost empty, and no one was sobbing. But then Orlando Bloom's character gets a phone call from his sister, and the movie goes from crappy to sappy.
I have a great idea. The movie should be remade so that Orlando Bloom boards the plane and meets Kirsten Dunst, but then a terrorist hijacks the plane and crashes it into Elizabethtown. I'll call it "The Tragic Five Minute Film of Two Actors with Pathetic Last Names who Can't Act if it Were To Save Their Lives".
It's not that I hate love stories. It's just that there are way-too-many of them. There are billions of people in the world today, most of whom have their personal love story. And that's not counting the billions of people who have lived. Plus all the sappy love movies Hollywood torments me with.
Speaking of love stories, yesterday I watched The Notebook. My family told me it was a great movie, so giving them the benefit of the doubt, I sat down. That night, I refused to sleep in my warm bed, wear my comfy pajamas, and cuddle my teddy bear. Instead, I chose to sleep on the living room couch in my t-shirt and boxers, just to be sure I wasn't losing any of my manly qualities after being exposed to sweet mush like that. As a precautionary measure, I also scratched my butt at random intervals and trained myself to drool on my soft pillow while I slept. Wait, did I say pillow? I meant armrest.
I don't like chocolate. As a child, I used to hurl if I ever ate more than a tiny bit. I don't eat my birthday cakes if the main flavor is chocolate. I only eat chocolate when I'm depressed. Which is never.
Romantics worldwide hope I choke and die at night because I refused to bow down and worship their sacred day and romantic classics.
